When we first arrived in Edinburgh, as an introduction to Scottish culture, they had us sit and listen to two gentlemen in suits talking in a monotonic Scottish accent for 4 hours. They had powerpoint slides and everything, and they just read things off the slides like tenured professors who have stopped giving a flying duck.
I went out looking for water but before I knew it, I was walking to the nearby ice cream shop and ordered myself a nice, mouthwatering scoop. When I came back, Delenn whispered: “My god you missed it. This guy just read Scottish words off a dictionary for half an hour. Every time he finished a word I thought he would stop, but he just kept going.”
Today, thousands of locals flocked to the streets to witness what was considered the first sighting of the sun in Edinburgh since the Great Miss Sunshine in 2001. According to several eyewitnesses, the sky was lit up blue for more than two hours from 11am to 1.10pm, Friday, July 1, 2016. The leaves dried up and suddenly, the locals realized that the leaves were of a cheerful shade of grey, not just a sad shade of grey.
Guys, I met a Knight. He shook my hand twice to demonstrate how the Queen shook his hand when he was knighted. The knight and I took a selfie–he made a funny face for a knight and I just used that ugly face I always have. You can scroll to the end to see the pic.
Today, Sir Thomas Martin Devine was our guest lecturer. In case you don’t know (tbh if you’re not Scottish then why would you), Sir Devine is regarded as the leading authority on the history of modern Scotland and its diaspora. He was knighted in the 2014 for “services to the study of Scottish history”, the first scholar to be so honored for this reason.