When we first arrived in Edinburgh, as an introduction to Scottish culture, they had us sit and listen to two gentlemen in suits talking in a monotonic Scottish accent for 4 hours. They had powerpoint slides and everything, and they just read things off the slides like tenured professors who have stopped giving a flying duck.
I went out looking for water but before I knew it, I was walking to the nearby ice cream shop and ordered myself a nice, mouthwatering scoop. When I came back, Delenn whispered: “My god you missed it. This guy just read Scottish words off a dictionary for half an hour. Every time he finished a word I thought he would stop, but he just kept going.”